Posted: Sun, Sep 11, 11 in Journal

God had a will for everyone’s life. he has a will for my life, he has a will for your life. and everything that we go through in life is already written in the chapters that God had prewritten for us before we were even thought of. so is it possible for us to go against God’s will? are we physically able to try to erase the story of our life and rewrite it the way we want to live it? i think that i am finally starting to realize that no matter how much i try, i’m never going to be able to get what i want out of life until i finally do what God wants me to do with my life.

sadly, if i’m not in church, my bible is hardly ever opened. everyday the same thought passes my mind, “i really need to read my bible today,” but i can never seem to get that to happen. then i wonder to myself why aren’t things in my life going exactly why i hope they would. this is a big part of it. it seems as if i’m not putting God first, because i can hardly give him a couple minutes of my 24 hour long day. i do pray often, but i feel like that alone won’t get me a deeper relationship with God. i need to dig deeper in his word before i can begin to dig deeper in him.

psalm 37:4-5 reads “delight yourself in the LORD and he shall give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the LORD, trust also in him, and he shall bring it to pass.” plain and simple. written right in the book that ironically i can never bring myself to open is the answer to my problems.  why can’t i have what my heart desires? because i haven’t delighted myself in God. i haven’t fully committed to him, or put all of my trust in him. when i can finally bring myself to do that, then he shall bring it to pass; then he will give me the desires of my heart.

it all starts with God. he’s jealous. he wants to be first in everything. and honestly, he deserves it. and at 3AM on a sunday morning God revealed this to me. i MUST delight myself in him, commit myself to him and put full trust in him before i can even think about starting to have all of my hearts desires. i have to get into his will first.

and that’s what i’m gonna do.


  1. Cory, this is awesome!!! Just yesterday I was having such a hard time just being able to focus and get into God’s word and finding myself looking at the time and doing anything but reading…and letting myself get sleepy. Our time in the word especially is so important to the health of our relationship. And the word WAS God…That hit me. Praying is good, but God’s word is what is so amazing. Thanks for posting!

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